<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Of Uchihas and Harunos by pillow forts (pyroooah)</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26005396">Of Uchihas and Harunos</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/pyroooah/pseuds/pillow%20forts'>pillow forts (pyroooah)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crack, Dad-jokes, Family Fluff, Gen, Humor, No Beta</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 04:09:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,030</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26005396</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/pyroooah/pseuds/pillow%20forts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Fugaku Uchiha and Kizashi Haruno, the rivalry for the ages.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Haruno Kizashi &amp; Uchiha Fugaku, Haruno Sakura &amp; Uchiha Sasuke</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>186</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Of Uchihas and Harunos</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tminor/gifts">Tminor</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi. More fics about Sakura's dad, I guess lol</p><p>Also this started with punmaster sarad asljdn bc of tess and it snowballed from there. Thanks tess.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>The Uchiha intended to be great, powerful and feared across the five shinobi nations. Uchiha Fugaku—at the tender age of six—was no exception to this fact. Most of the students in his class were idiots.</p><p>“Now class,” Kagami-sensei began. “We’ll be sparring each other today.” </p><p>“Haruno Kizashi, you’re up first, against Uchiha Fugaku.” </p><p>Haruno Kizashi—in retrospect—was not very bright. He made friends with the Akimichi for food, and he had infernal pink hair. What kind of ninja had pink hair? Do they intend to be a target? The boy got into stance opposite him and he grinned at him.</p><p>“Pleased to meet ya,” the cheerful child said. He made the seal of confrontation. “Haruno Kizashi at ya service!” </p><p>Fugaku narrowed his eyes, and Kagami-sensei folded his arms, and he didn’t reply. Pink infernal hair or not, he was going to face the wrath of the Uchiha.</p><p>The boy was clumsy with his kunai, but weirdly, he was dodging him, and then Fugaku heard him say.</p><p>“Uchiha-san, jeez!” He dodged! Why wasn’t the fool fighting him? “Do you know what happened to the man who got cut up on his left side?” A punch whizzed past his ear. “He’s all right now!” </p><p>Fugaku froze. His classmates froze. Kagami-sensei froze. Then Kizashi undercut his feet, sent Fugaku flying and falling on his backside, and he held a hand to his neck.</p><p>“Yield!” </p><p>“I guess that counts as a…” Kagami-sensei began slowly with an amused smile. “Win…?” </p><p>Fugaku couldn’t believe he lost to a peasant. </p>
<hr/><p>People said that if anyone ought to be a rival for Fugaku, it had to be the genius Minato Namikaze, right? </p><p>Wrong. </p><p>Fugaku loathed to admit it, but it was a boy with infernal pink hair. Haruno Kizashi was average. He wasn’t raised in a clan. He was the son of a restaurant owner and a kunoichi, but he had a sharp tongue for puns. Said boy always found creative ways to one-up him in spars with his stupid jokes and creativity. </p><p>But Fugaku never admitted this out loud. </p><p>“The name’s Kizashi Haruno, but you can call me pun-master,” he told his Itachi with a grin. “I used to beat your Pa at the academy.” </p><p>“You will call him no such things,” he told his son. </p><p>“Your dad’s still such a stuck-up. He can’t take a joke.” </p><p>“Your jokes are ridiculous!” he snapped. “Who uses a pun in the middle of a spar? As if your enemy has humor!” </p><p>“I thought Kagami-sensei said it was a creative move,” Kizashi said with his stupid grin plastered on his face. “Oh, I forgot how jealous you were.” </p><p>“I—” Fugaku remembered that he was twenty-eight, head of the clan, jounin, a true Uchiha at his prime, and the father of a four year old. He had no time for this nonsense. “I’m not arguing with you, Haruno.” </p><p>He also started the whole “Uchihahaha” nonsense which followed well into the future and made Fugaku’s academy days hell. Itachi simply blinked at the pink-haired man, who continued to grin at him, and he smiled back. Because Kizashi had an infectious stupid grin, and his personality was as irritatingly bright as his bubble gum hair. </p><p>How Kizashi was still alive was a mystery to him. </p><p>“Don’t mind us, Itachi-kun. We were pals in the academy.” </p><p>“We were not.” </p><p>“Fugaku was so jealous because I was popular among all the girls my age.” </p><p>Fugaku glared at him. “Son,” he said. “We must get going.” </p><p>“It was nice to meet you, Haruno-san,” Itachi said politely. </p><p>“And you too, Itachi-kun. If you ever want embarrassing dirt on your papa, just swing by the Haruno tea stand, okay?” </p><p>“Are you trying to contaminate my son with your ridiculousness?” </p><p>“I can tell you all about how your papa confessed to your mama—” </p><p>“That’s enough!” He turned and left. </p><p>“Hey, Fugaku,” he called out. “What did the buffalo say to his son when he left on a mission?” </p><p>Fugaku slapped his hands on his ears. </p><p>“Bison!” </p><p>Mikoto watched as her husband stormed in followed by a very concerned Itachi. She heard the study close, and she glanced down at her son with an amused smile.</p><p>“He met Kizashi-san, didn’t he?” she asked him.</p><p>Itachi nodded. “Kaa-san, how did you know?” </p><p>Mikoto chuckled.</p><p>“They go way back.” </p>
<hr/><p>When Itachi was seven, he was starting to get rebellious. Fugaku glanced down at his eight year old with a stern frown, and Itachi simply looked back.</p><p>“And where exactly were you?” </p><p>Without a blink, his son said, “The Haruno tea stall.” </p><p>“Wha—” </p><p>“Their dango was delicious,” he continued with that challenging stare. “Haruno-san was good company.” </p><p>Fugaku looked as if he was ready to storm out there, and find the fool himself, while Mikoto looked on with amusement. Sasuke toddled from her lap towards Itachi, who easily caught him. Fugaku pinched his nose and eyed his younger son.</p><p>“I suppose now the only one on my side is Sasuke,” he said before storming off down the hallway.</p><p>Itachi turned to his mother. </p><p>“Haruno-san has a daughter who is the same age as Sasuke,” he said.</p><p>Mikoto raised an eyebrow. “Does he now? How is she?” </p><p>“Pink,” he stated.  </p><p>Mikoto’s eyes lit up mischievously.</p>
<hr/><p>"Sasuke-kun," Sakura began one day when they were sixteen. "Did you know that your dad tried to get me off your genin team?" </p><p>Sasuke looked at her incredulously. "What?" </p><p>"Uhuh, apparently, Minato-sama was telling me that the other day," she said. "They were super rivals when they were young. My dad always talks about it. Geez! Papa's awful with his jokes." </p><p>And Sasuke didn't want to admit it, but he liked Haruno-san's jokes. But he didn't want to betray his father like his brother did. No, Sasuke was the only one on Fugaku's side. </p><p>"I mean, I asked him to pass the butter this morning, and he goes like, 'Do you want to know the rumor about the butter?' And then he goes like, well I'm not going to spread it!' Really?" </p><p>She thought heard a soft snort. She turned to look at him. He glanced at her blankly. </p><p>"What?" he asked her. </p><p>"Nothing," she said.</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>